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Just Do it ..makes someone's day |
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Written by Ninie Tatepa
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Monday, 16 July 2007 |
I ordered coffee the other day at a local café, and when it came
time to pay, the guy behind the counter waved his hand and said, 'No,
it's on the house because you have such a nice smile.'
I
walked for blocks with that very smile on my face, an even larger one
probably, because of that small nicety. I laughed a bit as I replayed
it in my head – I'd been standing next to a drop-dead gorgeous blond
who filled out her sweater very well, yet I was the one with the free
coffee. A definite spring was in my step, and it was like a fresh
breeze had gone through my work-clogged brain and made everything
sunshine-y and nice.
And I suddenly realised how easy it is to make someone feel good, to surprise someone by putting an unexpected smile on their
face.
The next day, I saw a woman on the Tube who had great
style - she had put together a top to toe look clearly her own, and she
radiated confidence. 'You have a fabulous style!' I blurted out, and
she turned and smiled broadly. 'Really? That's so sweet – thank you! I
felt a little out of sorts today actually, but that makes me feel quite
better!' I hate to say it, but I felt sort of smug knowing I'd
brightened her day a little – the unexpected return was I felt happy,
too.
Since then I've made a promise to do it every day. Share a bit of sun,
say the nice thing that's popped into your head instead of keeping it
quiet just because you're a stranger. Who cares if you're talking to
strangers on the street? The world will suddenly seem smaller,
friendlier and more pleasant to both of you. What the hell – give it a
try!
Just do it: Pay someone a compliment, smile at a stranger
or two on the street, let someone have your seat on the Tube, buy a
friend lunch, call your Mom just to say how much you appreciate her,
buy a pretty flower and give it to a total stranger who looks like
they're having a tough day – passing along a tiny bit of good will
reverberates long after the good deed is done.
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Last Updated ( Monday, 16 July 2007 )
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Are you lonely or alone ? |
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Written by Ninie Tatepa
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Friday, 27 October 2006 |
Some people naturally love their own company, but it is possible to learn to be happy by yourself. It is a valuable life skill.
One of the most pernicious social trends of the Noughties is the
need to be always busy - seeing something, doing something, being with
people. It is the root cause of untold hangovers, sky high phone bills
and empty bank accounts, not to mention really, really dull evenings.
Its
sufferers are easy to spot as they are invariably yakking noisily into
their mobiles about how they never have a moment to themselves and no,
they aren't free until next Tuesday or Wednesday the week after that.
A
former friend of mine had a really bad dose of it. Her diary would be
booked up for weeks on end and she saw such a lot of people she seemed
like the most popular person going - or one of the most desperate
because all too often she bitched and moaned about the people she
socialised with. When she finally got a man, she dropped almost
everyone because she no longer needed insurance against feeling lonely.
Sadly, in many cases, that's what drives the imperative to
always be busy: fear of being lonely. But being lonely and being alone
are not synonymous and, anyway, the strategy sucks because it is
possible to be lonely in a crowd or in a couple.
Some people
naturally love their own company, but it is possible to learn to be
happy by yourself. What's more, it is a valuable life skill that not
only removes the spectre of loneliness, it also, paradoxically, makes
you more attractive company. After all, desperation is never
attractive.
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Last Updated ( Saturday, 28 October 2006 )
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